Lame Names

The other day I was in a DollarTree store looking for cheap picture frames.  As I wandered among the Mardi Gras party stuff, plastic dishware, foam toys, air fresheners, vases, candle holders and other mobile home furnishings, I had an epiphany.  Very few items are a dollar or less. 

If you want to buy a case of say, plastic wine glasses,  you get 48 of them for $48 or $1 apiece.  If you want to buy one it’s $1.29.  Or if you want a bottle of dish washing soap it will cost you $1.49.  It is a dollar if you buy a case of 24.  You get the idea.   Stuff in the dollar store is more than a dollar, unless you buy a ten-year supply.  A more fitting name might be DollarPlus store or Hardly Ever A Dollar.

It made me wonder about other mis-named companies.  Here are a few I thought of and I’d love to hear yours.  By the way, car manufacturers are the clear champions of bad names. 

  • 7-11:  Should be 24-7 or Always Open or NeverClose
  • Hummer:  This was never a car when I was coming of age
  • Probe:  Maybe good for a colonoscopy but a lousy car name
  • Motel 6:  Rooms were $6 a night for about five minutes
  • Tiguan:  VW contest:  Pronounce it right and it’s free
  • MTV:  Let’s be honest, they quit doing music 20 years ago
  • I Has Cheezburger:  WTF?  Not a fast food company
  • Xfinity:  Name change right along with increase in down time
  • Golf:  VW has dopes naming cars
  • Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse:  Couldn’t they have done RPS to have one name?

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